3 Ways to Go Deeper with Gratitude

You’ve probably heard how beneficial it is to cultivate gratitude, maybe even keep a gratitude journal. That’s all well and good, but it can be easy for you to think of it as something on your to-do list and skim right by it.

At least, I notice this for myself. I can easily conjure up three things to be grateful for – having a job, owning my own home, and my kitties – that’s pretty high level. I don’t pause to feel the gratitude.

So, here are three tips for how to help keep this practice real.

Ask why

A few weeks ago, some friends gave me some extra apples they had from an apple-picking excursion, and I said, “Thank you.” But even though I expressed gratitude, I didn’t reflect on it much or ask why I was grateful, at least beyond the obvious.

If I want to get the full benefits of gratitude, though, I need to think about why I’m grateful. And in my example, I can think of several reasons why I’m happy about getting the apples from my friends.

The obvious reason is that it gave me some hand-picked apples to use for baking, which was especially nice because I hadn’t had a chance to go apple picking myself. I was also having company over soon so this gave me a chance to make one of my favorite desserts, apple crisp.

But beyond that, this extends to feeling grateful for the friendships I have. The friends who gave me the apples are the ones I go camping with every summer, and it’s now been over 10 years that we’ve been doing that. I also see them quite regularly, and they’re friends who can understand some of my nerdy references to things like Star Trek and Doctor Who, which I truly appreciate.

Then there’s the fact that it’s wonderful to get fruit grown locally, and in season. When I was younger, I never appreciated how much better food could taste when it was in season, or when it was grown by farmers who were focused more on taste and less on something that would ship well. It makes a huge difference, and it also feels good to know my friends supported a local orchard.

Does going deeper into the why of this take longer? Yes, but it’s also much more rewarding. I feel true gratitude this way, and it makes my heart expand and my day lighter.

Look beyond the obvious

Sometimes it can be hard to find things to be grateful for. We all have bad days. You may also have circumstances that put some roadblocks in the way of gratitude. In these cases, you may be able to recognize that things could be worse.

I’ve been having to do that lately. Almost two weeks ago, I had a bad fall when I tripped over a metal plate that was partly embedded in the sidewalk and also completely obscured by leaves. The result was a sprained right ankle (the foot that hit the metal object), a very bruised and sore left knee, and a bruised and swollen left arm (I landed on my left knee and forearm). I also skinned my hands and had the wind knocked out of me.

With something like that, I must admit that gratitude was not my first thought. But when I went to urgent care and the doctor said he was pretty sure I hadn’t broken any bones, I was grateful for that.

The folks at urgent care also asked me multiple times if I’d hit my head, which I hadn’t. That was something else to be grateful for. And while I wasn’t excited to have a sore left arm, I was relieved that it wasn’t my right arm since I’m right-handed.

But then I found something even more unexpected to be grateful for, in a strange way: the fact that I’d previously broken my left ankle. Not that I was glad I’d broken my ankle, but because I did, I still had an ankle brace that I could use on my right ankle. I also knew how to treat an injured ankle, including what physical therapy exercises to do, and I think that’s helping my right ankle heal a bit better and more quickly.

So, thinking about this feels like a good reminder that everything is about perspective, including gratitude.

Take nothing for granted – especially your body

It’s so easy to take things for granted, particularly our physical selves. We can get so caught up in thinking about all the things we don’t like or can’t do that it becomes very easy to ignore all the good things. Until something happens and it’s too late to appreciate.

For instance, how often do you have negative thoughts about your body instead of positive ones? Or maybe you don’t think much about it at all.

Except – without these wondrous forms, we wouldn’t have anything.

I don’t say this to make anyone feel bad about having negative body thoughts. I’ve had plenty of them.

But after my recent fall, I started thinking about how miraculous our bodies truly are. Even when they don’t work quite as expected, they’re often able to recover and adapt. Much as I’m not happy to be injured, it’s also quite amazing to see the progress of healing and know that my body is capable of doing this.

And it also makes me consider how much my body allows me to do. In fact, everything! From walking to eating to reading to playing with my cats and more.

So in thinking about gratitude, what if you thought about the best experiences of your life – and then recognized how your body allowed you to have that experience?

What’s interesting is that these don’t even have to be things you’d consider particularly physical. Maybe it was going to an amazing concert… staying up all night talking with friends… reading a story that moves you to tears or laughter… or learning how to make your favorite meal. None of this would be possible without a body.

And the best part is, your body doesn’t even have to be perfect to give you these moments. Which is good, since perfection doesn’t exist!

Being alive and in your body can be such an amazing gift. And it’s even more incredible when we let ourselves acknowledge that.

What about you?

I invite you to take a few moments to consider what you’re grateful for, and why. If you find that it makes you feel better and opens you up to the world around you, maybe you’ll decide to do it on a regular basis.

Either way, I’d love to hear what comes up for you.

And may you find much wonder and beauty in viewing the world in this way.